Cannabis
Nutrition Facts
Valeur nutritive
Per dosage/ per gram
Amount % Daily Value
Teneur % value quotidienne

Paranoia 110
Slowing of time 50
Grey-matter membrane converted to fat 0.00009
Psychotic thoughts 1
Sexual thoughts 0
Objective, qualified thoughts 0

Not a significant source of saturated knowledge, true happiness, mental stability, vitamin A, vitamin B, calcium or love. Has been proven to cause short bursts of happiness with long-term personal anguish. Long-term use (as little as one second) may cause lung cancer, impotency, graving for sugar based products, disassociation, social ineptitude, phobias, mental disorders such as dyslexia, obsession with Kung Fu movies and the inability to love in a meaningful and profound way. Have been proven to reduced human potential and stagnates intellectual growth. Other more serious illnesses include psychotic thoughts, urge to harm others. Oh and possiblity of a long-term career at McDonald’s.

Should have warned you that this was heavy-handed and only mildly cool. AND ironic because I’m high right now….just joking.